The Anatomy of a Fan Girl

It really is better to define something theoretical or intangible when you've experienced both its sides. Browsing my archive of posts written a year ago brings you to incongruous entries about K-pop. Needless to say, I was a fan of K-pop. A fan girl. A screamer and stalker brought to a safe level. An adversary of saving money and of my stingy self. I guess I still am when the moment requires it, like today when one of my friends generously and lovingly bought me a ticket to Super Junior's Super Show 3 3D screening.


My fan girl phase began just as abruptly as it ended otherwise. Before my third year in high school ended, a phenomenon sprouted from the humble Asian root of telenovelas, Korea, and we called it K-pop; that being the ultimate enemy of boys our age.

I blossomed into fandom a little late because at that time I was having some sort of self-imposed identity crisis. I didn't know what I wanted because I didn't want to know. For that, I lamented through stalking Korean pop idols (although my universe was confined to Super Junior only).  For a while, going with the flow of female hormone rage was fun, but I was pulled into the K-pop experience anyway. I blame Explorers of the Human Body, the variety show hosted by Super Junior, and Kim Kibum's fatally adorable smile.

Looking at me now, you would think it's impossible for me to have been a K-pop fan. I like indie music, for example. And I'm minimalistic; K-pop isn't. However the fact remains that I have been a fan and it is evident in my blog's history (which I plan on cleaning up soon because I used to write like a complete idiot) so I'll just assume that you are asking me what it's like to be a fan girl.

Being a fan girl requires a lot of sacrifices, mostly financial. If you're rich, you're lucky; but if you live in a country where jobs for minors are pretty much laughed at, updating your stock of K-pop merchandise gets frustrating. I never had any problem with buying the merchandise because I knew my obsessions are fleeting (I was right) and I'm not exactly the type who takes good care of things that aren't perpetually crucial to my existence. I do have a copy of their fourth album and a set of posters though. Two of the posters are still taped to my bedroom wall.

Also among the perks that come with being a fan girl is the infinite amount of energy you seem to pull out of your system whenever you see your bias. A bias is the member of a K-pop group whom you idolize/adore/love/want to marry/spend the night with the most. The last option is not exactly applicable since--

-- when you are a fan girl, your vows of celibacy can be "maintained" more easily. You have this mentality that someday you are going to end up with your bias, hence you tend to tip more to the I am going to be a prude edge.

Another thing you develop when you're a fan girl is the Other Fan Girls Radar. Your senses seem to heighten up when you're in a crowd of people, looking for possible co-fans. My friend is really good at spotting co-fans.

On the whole, I'm happy I've been a K-pop fan. I'm even happier I got to watch SS3 (Super Show 3. K-pop fans are fond of acronyms) even though the concert was just in 3D. Going through a fan girl phase is like going through a phase of growing up. You learn a lot. Trust me.

The ticket and my awesome "Cool story, bro!" face.

Then again, if you're a sad, narrow-minded git, don't.