My Advantage is I'm Younger

I can attest to the thought that my family is more religious than the average Christian household. We never miss Sunday mass and my parents are constantly among the attentive half of the church community. I try to listen to the priest's homily as much as I can but my mind always finds other things to worry about somehow. I know, as a seemingly devout Roman Catholic,  it is utterly unforgivable to daydream during mass. (Right now, actually, I'm thinking of an alibi for this.)


Lately my grandmother (my accomplice in the slaughter of spiders and whom I call Wawa) has been accompanying us (though I think it should be the other way around) to church. The trusty routine is to drop by the supermarket for grocery shopping  after the mass, and it usually turns out like this:

"Wawa, please do not touch those--" when we reach the canned goods section "-- they might fall off."

Or, "Wawa, hold on to the cart. You might slip or something."

I am still a concerned citizen despite my characteristic distrust in the human species.

See, my grandmother and I have a lot of adventures during grocery shopping. Earlier, though, she completely caught me off-guard.

I was observing the magazine stand that holds old issues that date back to last year. I saw a Candy mag with Logan Lerman on the cover page and squealed, ever the loyal fan girl, "Monique, it's Logan!"

Currently number one on my endless list of celebrity crushes.

My sister made a series of gag-and-puke faces (Logan isn't her type. How distasteful.) as I shoved the copy unto her face. My grandmother noticed this because she is a pseudo-spy, so I had to return the copy before my sister and I became the leads of the soap that is the supermarket. She asked me, then, as I was snickering my head off, "Do you want me to buy that for you?"

My sister and I laughed. Grandma picked up the copy and stared at the cover. That was a really, really awkward moment.

"How much is this?" She interrogated me for a while and I had to say, "No, it's all right, you don't have to buy that," over and over again. What are the odds of an entirely rabid Logan Lerman fan girl going to the supermarket to find a Candy magazine with his face on it, and having a grandmother with her to voluntarily purchase that magazine?

It looks like I have a rival.